GW - It's about time

Timing is everything. Whether you are looking for a mate, a new job, or an extra breadstick at lunch, timing needs to be on your side.

Today I decided to take advantage of the fact that my life partner, ahem, I mean “lunch” partner decided to go hang out with someone cooler than me. (This is fine, because he doesn’t know that today I added my 5th, and most likely final friend to my facebook page). Anywho at lunchtime I made a mad dash for some sub par Italian food at the Fazoli’s and to get another stamp on my buy ten meals get a drink free card. (It’s a lofty goal but sometimes I need to stretch myself).

Once I arrived I ordered the rigatoni romano, found myself a seat, and waited for the buzzer to beckon that my 6,000 calorie meal was ready for me to ingest. Now I should back up a little. I don’t really like Fazoli’s but the fact is, if you dine in, there are all you can eat breadsticks. SOLD!!! I was willing to risk the possibility of being a loner to receive a couple of extra 1,000 calorie buttery breadsticks.

However, timing was not on my side. Not only did a couple of co workers see me in my state of loneness, but I never receive an extra breadstick. Apparently the mentally handicapped breadstick Nazi will pass you by if you still have the initial breadsticks you received with your meal. Therefore, I quickly snarfed the final stick down and anxiously awaited her next pass through the tables.

To my surprise, she did not make the rounds again. She did however pass by my table with the breadstick tongs as if she was mocking me. I have never felt more like Pavlov’s dog than I did at that moment. While Jimmy Buffets Jingle bells played overhead (Yes it is only Nov 7th ……. again timing) I couldn’t help but think that all I want for Christmas is another Damn breadstick. But no luck! Does she not know I can go to the Olive Garden and have soup and all you can eat breadsticks for less money than I spent here? Do I have to hide my breadstick next time to get another one? Sometimes life just isn’t fair.

I don’t know if this is the case of not, but somehow I believe that the little red ridinghood retarded breadstick Nazi is still walking around the lobby passing out free breadsticks for the rest of her shift. If only I had waited a little longer, or had better timing.

All my Best,

GW