Everything I needed to know about life I learned on Facebook.

"I Facebook."  It's like hearing someone say "I breathe," isn't it?  Even after years of being on Facebook, I continue to be amazed by what people are willing to post online for the masses to read.  Seriously.  No, no. . . seriously. 

Sidenote: there is a good chance that this post may be a good ol' slap in the face to a good portion of my Facebook readers that also consider themselves FB aficionados.  I'm doing this for everyone's sanity so don't take it personal.  Also note that I do social media for a living so I see EVERYTHING you post so I've just become easily annoyed. . . I blame the frequency.

The last several months have taught me a lot about life. . . and not just mine.  I'd like to thank all of my FB buddies for teaching me all about life and your points of view on things.  Here is what I've learned:

• Jesus doesn't support spam emails or photos on Facebook.  In fact, He didn't even have Facebook when he was alive (that may shock you kiddos).  Me not "liking or sharing" a picture doesn't mean I hate Jesus or puppies or kids with cancer.  It just means I don't want to.
• Generally the people who talk the most about politics know the very least.  These people are also the perpetuation of misrepresentation of political ideals (smartest sentence I've written in a while).
  
• On a related topic: You can find an article or info-graphic to support your thoughts on anything.  That doesn't make it real or right or true.  (but feel free to use this blog to support your ideals at anytime. . . it's about as credible as NBC News or Fox these days).
• Mondays still stink. . . after all these years.  Thanks for the reminder.
• All kids with odd diseases are sweet and beautiful.  I know that you think these photos need "likes" to prove it but you don't.  100% of people should agree with me and if they don't, they are heartless and don't matter anyway.  And no, there isn't a company that is going to donate $1 to research said disease for every like their picture gets.  No company is that crazy. . . or that generous for that matter.
• Popping the world's largest zit is apparently more exciting than any other video on the internet, followed closely by Robert Pattinson moving out and fighting over their dog.  I just threw up in my mouth a little bit and am embarrassed for you.
• Equality and the right to free speech are both very, very important.  They are.  Any time we try to rank the order of importance of rights granted in the Constitution, we are in a bad place.  One is no more important than the other.  In fact, it is the right to free speech that allows minority groups to stand on a corner and picket a business.  Smell the irony?  What would happen if we boycotted everyone who said or watched or wrote something off-color or, I'll even grant, stupid in their lives?  (See previous bullet - a good portion of Facebook users should be boycotted for watching that video).  People can have opinions and you don't have to agree with them. . . that's what makes America great!
• eCards have made everyone funny.  "Thanks funny people who write eCards for letting me post twisted Hallmark cards online.  My "likes" have gone up 30%."

I've got some duck-face bathroom pictures to post (jokes, jokes. . . I take mine in the car) so I had better get to it.  Happy Facebooking, all.  And don't forget to share this post if you love puppies.